The bottom line is that no form of sex is completely without risk, but there are precautions you can take to make it safer.
Does anal sex hurt?
Anal sex can feel great, which is why many people include it as a regular part of their sex life. But Planned Parenthood notes that anal sex can hurt if you’re not relaxed or if you don’t use lube. As we explain below, it’s not something you should jump into without a little preparation. Things like using plenty of lube and starting by inserting smaller things (like a finger) into your anus, then working up to bigger things (like a penis) can lessen the pain. You should also keep an open flow of communication during partnered anal sex so you can tell your partner how fast or slow they should go, if you need more lube, what feels good, and anything else that’s on your mind. Great communication can help you have a more pleasurable experience.
Anal sex should never be painful if you take the correct steps, and if it is, you should stop. As Planned Parenthood notes, sex should feel good, so if it’s painful or uncomfortable, ask your partner to stop.
The appeal of anal sex when you have a prostate
For those of you with prostates, being on the receiving end of anal sex can be a great experience.
First of all: What is a prostate? The prostate is a gland near the bladder that produces prostate fluid, one of the main elements of semen. It is located just in front of the rectum and can be stimulated with a toy, fingers, or penis. It feels like a solid, small bulge.
It feels good to have the prostate stimulated. This is one of the reasons receiving anal sex when you have a prostate can be very enjoyable. You can even have a prostate-induced orgasm!
The appeal of anal sex when you do not have a prostate
Just because you have a vagina does not mean anal is off-limits. Many vagina owners love anal play. You don’t need to have a prostate to enjoy anal sex. For those without a prostate, having your anus stimulated can still be great — remember all those nerve endings are still in the fold here.
It is often described as a feeling of fullness, which can be delightful. Most orgasms stem from the clitoris, including anal orgasms. The clitoris is the epicenter of pleasure for clitoris-owning people. It is the only part of the female anatomy designed specifically for pleasure. For some vagina owners, anal sex can stimulate the internal clitoris, which is highly pleasurable.
The anus is not as malleable as a vagina, which has the ability to accommodate an infant’s head by design. The anus is very tight, and the feeling of having something in your rectal area is unique. It is often described as a feeling of fullness, which can be delightful.
How to ask your partner if they’re ready to try anal sex
Whether you are planning to give or receive anal sex, a conversation must take place beforehand. Enthusiastic consent is necessary for both parties to enjoy the experience.
Asking for anal can be a bit daunting, no matter who you are. Have a one-on-one with your partner and let them know that this is something you want to try. Be honest about your feelings about it. In a healthy relationship, you should be able to discuss anything openly. Everyone wants to have a good experience. If they are into it, go ahead and get started.
How to have anal sex
Here is the real deal. You can’t just decide you’re going to start having anal one day and then go for it, anchors away!
Nope. Not a great idea. You need to start slowly. The anus is a muscle that needs to be worked up to having larger objects inserted. Start with finger or a small (I do mean v. small) butt plug and either warm yourself up or have a partner help. To do this, lube up your finger or toy and gently massage the anus. As you feel more aroused and comfortable, work the object inside. Gently move it around to loosen up the area.
Never put any toy up your butt that does not have a flared base. You do not want to lose anything up there — the rectum is expansive. No, you cannot just “poop it out.”
When you do have anal sex, go slowly.
When you do have anal sex, go slowly. Regular communication with your partner is essential. If something hurts, say so and stop. Take a breather. Be sure to relax as much as possible. If you tense up, it will make things much more difficult and therefore less fun. And as always, remember to prioritize your safety and use protection.
Lube is a must
Lube is essential for comfortable (and safe) anal sex. The anus does not naturally lubricate the way a vagina does. If you want to have a good experience, the more lube the better.
CHECK OUT THE FREE APP BELOW